Good Candidates

“Hello, I’d like to check myself in.”

The several chairs around the room stood empty. The lobby itself was painted white, or maybe just a shade off. It smelled sterile. The only other person present was the woman behind the desk who gave him an odd look.

“You want to check yourself in?”

“Yes, ma’am.”

“You know this isn’t a spa or something, right? It’s not a place for the wealthy to relax.”

“That’s good to hear.”

The confused look on her face deepened. “So why do you want to check yourself in?”

“I’m hearing voices.”

You don’t have to do this.


“Well, voice actually. Just one.”

What can I do to convince you?

“So you’re hearing a single voice, and you think you need to be admitted to a mental health facility? You sound sane to me.”

You are sane. Leave and I will explain everything.

“The voice says it’s God and tells me to do things.”

“Oh. Well. I’ll have someone come down to talk to you. Please fill out these forms and have a seat.”

“Thank you.”

Do you want a sign? Surely I can do something to make you believe.

“I’m not talking to you!”

The woman behind the desk now looked more nervous than confused.

“I’m sorry,” he said. “It’s getting harder to ignore.”

She nodded and picked up the phone on her desk.

*     *     *

We lost another one.

How many does that make in the past week?

I have lost count.

No, you haven’t.

Very well, the number depresses me, so I do not wish to dwell on it.

Ah. Did this one go to a mental institution as well?

Yes. None of them seem to believe I AM speaking to them.

Maybe you should try one of the religious leaders again?

No. The last time I tried, they just ignored me and kept preaching what they liked. They just do not listen.

We have to keep trying.

I know. But we seem to be running out of good candidates.

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