The List

The room looked as though no one lived in it. There were no personal items on the shelves or walls, and nothing was out of place. The books could easily have been placed for decoration. The only sign that someone had been there, besides the absence of dust, was a single piece of paper on the desk.

On the paper was a short list of simple statements:

  • Matthew has moved out.
  • David has just moved in.
  • David has only met Sarah.
  • Julia has not died.
  • Bailey has not come to the house.

The handwriting on the note was clean and simple. There were no flourishes, but each letter was written carefully.

A man appeared in the previously empty room. He was tall and gaunt, his eyes sunken and tired. After walking over to the desk, he picked up the note and read through it carefully. Then he sat down in one of the arm chairs and closed his eyes.

Thomas knew now when he was. The list was sufficient, both because of what it did contain and also because of what it did not. This was his present, if any time deserved the name. The list helped him separate what was true from what might be true later. The future that had not yet happened, and the past that was already set.

The list also reminded him of things that were important and needed attention. He could not spend all of his energies in the possible future; action was required in the here and now to bring that future into being. Or avoid it, in some cases.

A dull ache throbbed through his temples. Projecting ahead created more strain than looking back, probably because of the uncertainty inherent in the future. It didn’t stop him from going forward. It was better to get a sense of what might happen than to be caught unawares. It was the only way to have a chance to avoid the worst.

Thomas forced himself to stand. A shower and a shave would help him feel a bit more human and help ground him in the now. He needed to consider his next moves. Talking with Julia again probably wouldn’t help, but he could try. Jason was another option, but he was unlikely to be of any assistance. Thomas finally decided he was too exhausted to make any decisions at the moment. He definitely needed to get cleaned up and get some rest. There was still time to act. He made sure the list was still on the desk in case he came back to this moment while he was in the shower.